During half term, my daughter (age 6) got to stay up a little longer than usual and while I was out the room managed to watch a few minutes from the beginning of the vampire movie Twilight. She’s always had a soft spot for romantic films and is regularly hooked by teen romances and even grown up films like The Proposal and Grown Ups.

I groaned when I saw how entranced she was by the loveydovey glances between Robert Pattinson and the world’s dullest teen actress (errr… respected indy arthouse star). Having endured the film once before, I knew that although Twilight’s plot and acting weren’t in any way too advanced for a six year old it would still be much too scary for her. “Ok you can’t watch this, it’s too scary.” “Why?” “He’s a vampire”

“Like in Monster High?” She retorted. I forgot vampires aren’t scary any more. But she was still way too young to be watching this whiny, angst-ridden, boy-obsessed teenager, who for this dad anyway, is most definitely not a suitable role model for a little girl. But things then went better than I could have hoped for.

“If he’s a vampire, why is he not eating her?” She asked.

“He’s a good vampire.”

“Why?”

“He only eats animals”.

“ANIMALS” she screeched, “He eats animals!?”

I guess the discussion about why she thinks eating animals is worse to her than eating people can wait for another day…